Enjoying Summer

by Raegan Densmore

Work does not stop once school is over. Two days after I got home from school for the summer, I started a full time summer job. It keeps me busy, I have quite a bit of freedom, and even some independence, but nevertheless, it's a job. It's work that I have to be at for the majority of my summer. When I come home, I am tired and do not want to do anything, on my days off it's the same. I also worry about spending money as well. So I restrain myself from actually enjoying my summer. Spending each moment counting how much time has passed and how much time is left to go is quite soul sucking. I realized quickly how irritated and depressed it was making me. I needed to start letting go of the stress and restraint, and so far, it has been making me quite happier. 

Anytime I am invited to go to things when I have free time, I have often said no because I have the urge to relax at home. But it is not so relaxing when you spend the day doing absolutely nothing and then feel guilty about it. Last month my mom asked if I wanted to go to Saint John for a night. She was going with my brothers for their basketball tournament, which to be honest, I am not too interested in, but I had never been to Saint John before. I said no at first, I also had school stuff to figure out, and of course, the trip took place during my days off, and I could have some alone time. But eventually I decided to go. I decided that I should get out of the house, and stop the-go-to-work-then-be-lazy cycle, and I actually had a great time. I got to walk around Saint John, and explore the city. The hotel was quite nice too and spending time with my littlest brother was great. 

It is not only the potential activities, but I have also lost out on the ones I used to do as well. Last summer I spent so much time hanging out with my friend. We would hang out in Sackville until 12am sometimes. I always looked forward to it. This summer however, we both have jobs with more hours, and our schedules do not align that well most of the time. The only time we get to hang out is on his days off when I get off of work. Even then, our hang outs are shorter than they used to be because I, and oftentimes both of us have to get up early the next morning. Such restricted time is quite annoying. I feel like it's hard to think about our hangouts without thinking about how late is too late, and will I be able to get up in the morning. I have begun to chill out with that because I miss how carefree we were last year. It feels so much better to enjoy the moment and actually spend quality time with a friend without thinking about your job. 

I am always anxious about taking time off of work because I think about the lost money. And with that, I become paranoid about spending money as well. I was battling in my head about going on a little trip for a weekend to Toronto because of that. I will admit, I miss it there all the time and was eager to spend time there in the summer. I finally booked a flight three weeks in advance and just came home from the trip today, as I am writing this. Yes money was spent, but I got to do something for myself, and I had a great time. I never make large purchases so this was my first one in a very long time. I believe that I should be able to do that if I work hard for it and save my money majority of the time anyways. This trip was another thing I can add to my list of fun things I did over the summer. Although working all summer comes with a lot of benefits, I believe that I should be able to spend time doing exciting things and enjoying my summer as well. I would like to enjoy myself without always worrying about consequences.